I have a story I want to share! Not my proudest moment, but the Lord really spoke to me through it.

I was coming off of Slab Fork Rd to get on the four-lane going to Beckley. I had just suffered a major panic attack (I haven’t had one in years!) and decided I needed to be alone. I put in a curbside pick-up and was going to get it.

So I was about a car length away from the intersection, and I stopped to see if anything was coming. I do that often because I feel like I can see better from there. Lol. When I got to the stop sign, I saw that it was clear and didn’t do another complete stop – it was more of a “roll stop” or a “yield.” lol.

Sure enough, he pulled me over as soon as I pulled onto the road.

NOTE: I do things out of habit and do not even realize I do them until someone points them out. I was calming down from the panic attack and was listening to a testimony podcast, and I was the part where a girl was telling how a demon was cast out of her. How she lived a life of manipulation and lying. So I was in another place in my head.

As soon as I got to the opposite side, I saw the police car. I am like, “well, I haven’t gotten a ticket in about 35-37 years, but I will get one today!”

I pulled over, and the patrolman (who was very nice btw) came up to the window on the passenger’s side so he wouldn’t be in the line of traffic to get hit!

I said hello, commented on him not wanting to get run over, and then asked what I had done.

He smiled.

Patrolman: You didn’t come to a complete stop at the stop sign, ma’am.

Me: I realize that. It was more of a yield, lol. So yeah, you are right!

Patrolman: Ma’am, we have had a lot of accidents, and we are trying to make people more aware, so I had to stop you.

Me: I understand. I am guilty. So whatever you need to do, I understand.

Patrolman: Ma’am, you didn’t sto… wait, what did you say?

Me: I said you are right, and I didn’t come to a complete stop, and I know why you pulled me over.

Patrolman: Really?

Me: Yep! and I laughed a little. I am guilty.

Patrolman: Well, can I see your driver’s license and your information?

Me: Sure

Patrolman: I will be right back….

so I waited for a few minutes

Patrolman: I am sorry, Ms. Smith, but I have to give you a citation.

Me: What does that mean?

Patrolman, looking down: Well, I hate it, but I had to write you a ticket.

Me: Ok. Where do I pay, how much is it…etc. and he told me.

Then he said

Patrolman: Ms. Smith, you are not guilty until the judge says you are guilty. So, you can contest this if you want.

Me: Will you be there?

Patrolman: Yeah

Me: Why would I get in front of a judge and lie knowing I had to look at you, and you know I am guilty? I was just listening to a testimony of a girl that was demon-possessed because of how she lived; it allowed the devil to control her, so why would I lie when I know that the devil will get the advantage over me. So I will pay for my ticket and plead no contest.

Patrolman: Are you for real? (Smiling.)

Me: Yeah, I guess I am.

Patrolman: You understand you can contest this, and maybe the judge will let you off without paying. I wish I could take it back, but it is in the system now; I’m sorry.

Me: Don’t be. I got what I deserved lol I will pay for the ticket.

Patrolman: You understand you can contest this, and maybe the judge will let you off without paying (he reinterated).

Me: I do, but it is what it is!

Patrolman: thank you for not fighting with me over this, lol. You have a nice day, and stay safe.

I did look before I pulled out just to be safe!!! lol

WHAT LESSON DID THE LORD TEACH ME? I am glad you asked!

I was thinking about the whole interaction as I was going to get my groceries. I feel like the Lord told me this:

You committed a wrong. You got pulled over and you agreed with your “accuser.” Yeah, because I was guilty. He said, “that is like me and the Father (the ultimate judge). You come to me, admitted your “sin,” and you are ready for your penalty from sin. Which is death.”

“Yeah” that is what I deserve when I sin. But just as the patrolman told me, “You are not guilty until the Judge says you are,” my Father will look at you and judge you according to your truthfulness, your confession to me, and your sorrow for committing the “sin.” You are not guilty until the “Judge” says you are.

Even though the sin caused me to have a penalty of death, God will judge my heart. My repentance. My confession to the Redeemer of mankind. My truthfulness in what I have done.

So when we all stand before the Father (Judge) we are not guilty until He says we are. What are YOU doing to get the “charges dropped?”

I am the kind of person that will keep beating myself up when I mess up. I cannot let it go sometimes. I will tell the great “Judge” how guilty I am. How sorry I am. How ashamed I am. Then I wait for the harshness of the Judge. But when I look at Him, He sees me through the eyes of Jesus (His son). He has a soft place in His heart for His son, He has a soft place for me as His child. I then remember, I am not guilty until HE says I am. He judges with mercy and grace and I am forever thankful for that!